Trust and Politics

This grieving for the boom is messing with my head still. I didn't get sucked in to the excess, so maybe I'm grieving that I didn't even get to enjoy the party while it lasted, and now I'm getting a hangover by proxy.

I know - we all know - that we're being lied to, conditioned, prepared. The parties are on an election footing, and the gloves are off. But somehow, it feels like an inter-necine war... There's an element of collegiality still about the members of the political classes that is stomach-churning.

A few months ago, when I was still more angry than sad about what was happening, I felt like manning the barricades. If someone - anyone - had stood up and said they were as mad as hell and they weren't going to take it anymore, I'd have stood shoulder to shoulder with them. Knowing me, I'd probably be wearing a hoodie that'd cover my face for all intents and purposes.

Yes, I'm still a victim of respectability. Staunchly middle-class parents, with aspirations to be upper-middle-class, ensured that I still can't imagine myself voting Sinn Féin for instance. A sad reflection...

The anger has turned to fear and loathing. I don't recognise myself anymore. I spend endless hours at night, reading the commentaries of experts. I still don't know any more than I did then. There's a kind of paralysis that I know I'm not alone in feeling. I want to be active, to actively contribute to the destruction of the political classes we have spawned. I worry that that same creeping paralysis is becoming more and more apparent.

News stories are less and less shocking. But not because of content, but because of conditioing.

It's bad.
It's really bad
It's REALLY really bad.
This could kill us
It's attacking
We're dead - RIP Ireland

And there are those who see themselves asmembers of the Party! Dead maybe, but STILL members of the Party. Martyrs to a grubby cause. This country is becoming radicalised in a whole new obscene way...

Please someone clean and minty - save my sanity.